God is Good.

I didn't think it could get any better so soon--but it did and we thank God for allowing so many amazing experiences for Rusty and me-- and in record timing! I'll cut to the chase--

After 24 days, Rusty and I were able to hold Par for the first time today.

Thanks to our great nurse, Jenn--we held him around 1pm. I really couldn't believe it--Jenn had mentioned yesterday that we might be able to today--but he didn't have a great blood gas this morning, so I was more worried about how Par is doing on CPAP than I was about getting to hold him--don't get me wrong--it is all I think about--but I've known that I only wanted God's perfect timing with everything--from extubation to holding him--I just didn't realize they'd come back to back. When we arrived to see Par he was awake and sucking on his pacifier--his suck is so loud you can hear it as you approach his bed--pretty funny. The only problem is that you have to hold it in for him--he is very high maintenance! Anyway, as soon as I took over her pacy holding position she said "We're going to get a blood gas right now and then you'll probably get to hold him"--I was thrilled and tried to pep talk him about giving a good blood gas so we could--he performed admirably with a fantastic blood gas!

Okay...so of course we have video of us holding him...in the videos, Par is crying when I'm holding him and completely content when Rusty is holding him. What you won't see is that once everyone left us (Rusty, Par & me) alone, he immediately stopped crying and just sucked his pacy and gazed at both of us--he was happy--he just didn't like the commotion. I'm telling you that so you don't think "Oh, poor Liz--he cried the entire time." After I held him for a while, Sal came back to see me holding Par and she got to see him with his eyes open for the first time! Then mom and dad took turns coming back--and Par was such a good little boy for his audience. A lot of the nurses came by to take a peak knowing that it was our first time to hold him--for such a "sterile" environment--the NICU sure does seem to brighten up with something so simple as a mother and father holding their baby for the first time. Also, for Rusty to hold Par, I had to pass him off to Rusty--so there wasn't anyone to take a video of that--then I picked up the camera and started filming--but we were afraid the battery was going to die and I definitely wanted pictures--so it cut Rusty's video short.





I'm afraid that he liked us holding him a little too much and Jenn tried to impress upon me that because of his UA line, some nurses won't let us hold him still--so just because we held him today, it doesn't mean we can hold him tomorrow. Plus, he has to still be progressing--sometimes too much stimulation can throw them off and then their saturations go down or bad blood gases--anyway--we'll just take it day by day. I just don't want to get to a point where he is crying to be held and we can't hold him--so we're going to try and be really patient about it--but we're definitely already addicted.








After all of the excitement--Par needed some rest so we sat there with him in his bed and waited for him to fall asleep. He isn't quite as sleepy because they have weaned his sedation medicine even more in an effort to get him to move around a bit more because his film from this morning showed his left lung a little wet (which is completely normal for a baby who was just extubated yesterday--because he can't be suctioned anymore he has to figure out how to "cough it up"--it just takes a little time). After sitting with him and holding his pacifier in his mouth for over an hour, he finally fell asleep. We felt this was a good time to leave so we could beat the game traffic (huge game--Florida plays Florida State today).


As we were leaving the NICU was spoke to Tina & Josh (Ella's parents) and they asked us about the "holding experience"--we told them how wonderful it was. We told them that we didn't cry as we both had thought we would--they assured us that once we saw the pictures and video of today we most certainly would--they were right. Watching it on video for the first time felt even more emotional and we both cried--what a gift is our son! What an amazing gift is parenthood! I pray that we both can hold on to this profound understanding God's love that we have experienced today--if we can, life will be sweet for a very long time...if not, we have this moment to remind us.

We headed back over to see Par after dinner--and thankfully he was asleep--so we just said his bedtime prayer over him and then kissed him goodnight. We want to remind everyone of the other precious babies in the NICU--Ella, Jonathan and the new CDH Baby girl. Ella is recovering well from her recent surgery--there is talk of extubating her in the next few days--but I know her parents want her to just take her time--please pray that Dr. Kays will be able to discern the perfect timing for this step and the step to start her feedings. Jonathan is still on ECMO and waiting for his repair surgery--we continue to pray for his liver and kidney functions. And the new little baby--we saw today that she has been put on ECMO. We ask that the Lord will protect and comfort her and her parents during this journey that has just begun.


We thank the Lord again for His many blessings.

Love,
Liz, Rusty & our son, Par

PS- The extubation video from yesterday's post is now working properly